Frog Guts

If you are looking for a post like yesterday's that has some deep spiritual meaning, you're not going to get it with today's post. This is another amusing story like the trash story that so many of you have laughed at me about and that's okay. If I can bring other's joy and bring a smile to many faces, it's a good thing. So here's my adventure for the day.

When we first moved into our new house, one of the things that I loved is that it was in the same neighborhood as my school. I know most all of the teens and young people in the area. I've either had them in school or have had their siblings. When I first started telling my students that I was moving, I had several of my boys approach me about mowing my lawn. I live on about 1/3 of an acre and most of it is lawn. I love having a beautiful yard and take great pains to keep the outside of the house looking neat and trim. The weekend before we moved in, one of my students came to the house and said, "Mrs. Morrison, your lawn looks horrible. I can mow it for you for $10." I thought that was a great bargain, so I hired him and told him that he needed to be dependable. He assured me that he had 15 other customers and a hired staff of other students that I knew and I could totally depend on him. He came every week like clockwork and even trimmed my hedges. I was so excited that it meant that I didn't have to mow my lawn or do yard work. I could afford $10 a week. This was great for about 4 weeks and then... the lawnmower boy bailed on me. 4 weeks work and he never came back. He's 14 years old what did I expect? I've seen him at the pool with his friends and he's told me that his mower broke an he was getting a new one, blah, blah, blah. Being a middle school teacher, this did not surprise me in the least. Kids this age have a tendency to enthusiastically commit to something only to back out when they get a better offer.

So I had to face reality. The lawn was now my responsibility. The only problem was that I didn't have a lawn mower. I talked with my step-mom who had 2 lawnmowers and was willing to let me have one. I love my mom! My uncle and cousin went to get the lawn mower ready for me and when they pulled it for the first time, the pull cord ripped right off. Three weeks later, I finally get it replaced. I am anxious to get started and mow my own lawn. I probably have mowed a lawn like 5 times in my whole life, but how difficult could this be really?

I went into the garage, got out the mower, made sure it had gas and moved the mower to the lawn. Before I went outside, I gave both kids breakfast and sat them down in front of a good video on T.V. I told them to stay inside as I didn't want them to point laugh and generally ask a lot of questions and try to "help". I start the mower on the first try with now problem and then start to mow. I didn't realize how tricky it is to make straight lines up an down the lawn. I have no clue how those huge, manicured, professionally maintained lawns can have such straight lines. My lawn has so many crooked lines it looks as though I was blindfolded as I pushed the mower around.

When I am almost done the lawn, I decide to go up to the back portion that's near the wooded section of the property. I am almost done and oh so proud of myself when I look down and see this small brown frog. Joey and Danny caught a small tree frog about a month ago and named it Gilbert. As I looked down I thought for a split second, "Hey, I wonder if that's Gilbert?" Just as the thought entered my mind, the unthinkable happened...

Gilbert jumped directly in the path of the lawnmower and I couldn't stop...

The mangled remains of Gilbert shot out the doohickey that spits out the grass. Gilbert was completely and utterly destroyed. His guts splattered against a tree.

Thank goodness I had the wisdom to tell the boys to stay inside. I then continued to mow the rest of the lawn hoping Gilbert's remains would get miraculously cleaned off the blades as there was no way I was shutting the lawn mower off and turning it over to check what was there.

If anyone wants to mow my lawn for the rest of the summer, please let me know. I pay $10 and you would be saving the lives of the amphibians that live in my backyard.