Monday, September 5, 2011

Pain

I had a conversation with a friend tonight about pain, specifically emotional pain.  When we are in pain, we often get very self-centered. We feel that our pain is worse than anyone else's.  No matter what we've gone through, we feel it is the worse possible situation that anyone could go through and that no one else in the world could possibly understand what we've gone or are going through.  We deserve to have everyone look at us and say,"I'm so sorry.  I'm sure no one has ever been through anything as horrible as you've gone through."

We expect for people to read our minds and not to mention anything that causes us pain, no matter how innocent the comment is.  Sometimes people can be truly insensitive, but most times, people don't even realize they are causing you pain.  They may say something innocently and it goes right to your heart and stays there like a dart on a dartboard.

Recently, I've gone through a period of being down in the dumps again.  My losses over the past two years have been extreme and I continue to face loss.  Sometimes it really, really hurts.  I have people in my life that have thought the were being helpful and they've only served to cause me more pain.  Then I was reminded by my friend of what I posted a few weeks ago.  In this post, I realized that when I feel this way, I am focusing on myself.  That is exactly what I'm doing.  I am again wallowing in self pity.

So, I am going to shake myself by the shoulders, slap myself upside the head and put on my big girl panties and buck up.

Then I'm going to remember that there are others out there that are going through more pain than myself. I will pray for those people tonight and ask God to not only take away the pain in my heart, but the pain in theirs as well.

Lastly, I will thank God for Jesus.  He went through more pain on the cross and the events that led up to the cross than I can even fathom.  It says in the Bible,


 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”  ~Matthew 11:28-30


So, tonight I will lay my burden down at the feet of Jesus.  I will not try to bear these burdens on my own.  He will carry me through.


If you are going through emotional pain tonight, please realize two things.  The first is that your pain is very real.  It feels like the worst thing you could possibly go through.  Second, there are other people in the world that are going through something worse than you are.  I only say this because it will help you to put your pain into perspective.  Look for how you can help and encourage those people.  I promise you that it will make you feel better and will change your perspective on your pain.  Look for opportunities to volunteer or to do something that will bless others.  In return, you will be surprised at the fact that YOU will be the one who will receive the blessings.


Last, turn to God to help you carry your burdens.  If you don't have a personal relationship with God, email me at teachflute@yahoo.com and ask me.  I will pray for you and tell you how you can start a relationship with the God of all creation.  If he can make a tree, place the stars in the sky or paint amazing sunsets, He can carry your load.  He wants to be there for you just like a parent wants to be there for his/her child.  



3 comments:

  1. (((Judi)))

    I have a friend who, whenever I start up with a pity party, always tells me about others who are worse off than I am. That always annoys the fire out of me! I want to be heard and I want some sympathy. I don't want to be told that I have it good compared to somebody else. It's really hard to care about anyone else when you are in deep pain yourself. Sometimes I just can't pray for anyone else; at those times, I usually don't have words to pray for myself! But I do know that taking the focus off myself helps. And when the pain isn't so bad, I do pray for others. I've noticed that when I get into a bad funk, it never lasts more than 3 days. For some reason, after 3 days of despair, my optimism bounces back.

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  2. Brenda,

    I agree with you that when you are mired down in that pain it is annoying and sometimes painful when others remind you of people that are worse off than you are. I totally hate that, but what I'm trying to do is to remind myself of that fact. It seems that when I can retrain my thinking to think more of others and less of myself. But, I agree, when I go to my friends and want to "vent", I don't want them reminding me of others that have it worse. Again, at that moment, my pain is the worst pain in the world in my own mind. :)

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